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Category Archives: God’s Grace

please remember, my month of september

So far, this year has all but chewed me up and spat me out, ground the remains, then sent them through the shredder before the incinerator was called upon.

You see, am supposed to be planning, preparing and blah blah – Yeah, that’s right, I currently sipping a tall glass of lemonade. This was all until Monday morning happened to me ;). I’ve been going around, writing bitter tasting posts, singing the song; if they knew my story, boo-hoo me, everybody hates me, why me – talk about doing badly, indeed.

Well, Monday morning, i noticed something (blame it on the curse of seeing the little details), and suddenly, I was filled with a sense of calm. No, I am don’t think I should call it the peace of God, for you see, this particular thing should have set me on edge, but it didn’t.

I have been unconsciously choosing to hold on to it, my past uncertainty, my past doubt, my past choices – rethinking, reanalysing each step of the way – Yup, extremely unhealthy I know! Then i remembered a devotional that i read much earlier in the year…

It talked about why God chose to take the Israelites through the wilderness, because, you see there was a shorter more direct route available. The focus wasn’t the destination but it was the journey to the destination. Like me, their focus was on the ‘get-me-to-the-promise’, man I cannot wait – yet God’s focus was, I desire for you to know me, for you to trust me, let’s take this route instead, I am longing to show you who I say I am. Trust me.

And that is exactly what I did, let it go, and keep walking.

Haha, no, everything isn’t magically okay now, and no, certain individuals still treat me different, but that is when I remember, we are all human, and it is in our human weakness that God is made known. You know, the glow that shines on you when you feel like crap.

Yes, so this letting-go-thing is quite liberating. Last evening, like most Kampalans, I rushed out of office to avoid the rain and traffic. I got to my stage in record time, 15mins, and then there were no taxis, when one comes along 30 minutes later, we were literally pushing and shoving our way in. Then we got held up in traffics for close to an hour. The skies opened, and down came the rain in millions of angry sheets. My immediate thought was, Lord, what is your problem?? Can’t you see I am trying here??? and then it occured to me, I have never walked/danced/sang in the rain before. No, I am not kidding! So when the taxi made the miraculous ascent up the steep slippery gullied-hill (bytheway, thank you for that Lord.), and stopped at my stage, I jumped out, opened my run-down-broken excuse of an umbrella and shielded my hair.

That was when I saw it. The huge road-gullies were filled with water rushing about angrily, with the rain still pouring I made my way toward it timidly. I began calculating the probability of my shoe being taken away by the current, what were the odds I will fall, I wondered. Adjacent to me, a little pub open for business, in front of the pub, the locals already warming themselves with a little something, sat staring at me. I was their evening’s entertainment, I’ll wager a few placed bets.

As I walked up and down the gulley in the pouring rain, I finally said to hell with it. I inched as close as I could get with out falling, drew a deep breath, then jumped. Yes, my eyes were shut at that moment. You have no idea how liberated I felt at that moment. As I walked up the hill, a conqueror returning from a conquest, I thought hit me – ‘while you are here, you might as well take pictures of this feat’. Yup, and wouldn’t you know it, I fulled out the little camera, and began snapping away – yes, it was still pouring pretty hard.

Awww man, I loved it! True, my shoes may never recover, my hair is… well… as it is, but I loved it!

Even know as the rain has just started falling again, I’m smiling to myself, because I have a secret…

You no longer have a hold on me.

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Posted by on September 6, 2011 in GOD, God's Grace, Inspiration, Life, Me

 

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Denial

Denial is a favorite method of coping for many Christians. But not with Jesus. He wants truth in the inmost being, and to get it there he’s got to take us into our inmost being. One way he’ll do this is by bringing up an old memory. You’ll be driving down the road and suddenly remember something from your childhood. Or maybe you’ll have a dream about a long-forgotten person, event, or place. However he brings it up, go with him there. He has something to say to you.

The lessons that have been laid down in pain can be accessed only in pain. Christ must open the wound, not just bandage it over. Sometimes he’ll take us there by having an event repeat itself years later, only with new characters in the current situation. We find ourselves overlooked for a job, just as we were overlooked by our parents. Or we experience fear again, just as we felt those lonely nights in our room upstairs.

These are all invitations to go with him into the deep waters of the heart, uncover the lies buried down there, and bring in the truth that will set us free. Don’t just bury it quickly; ask God what he is wanting to speak to.

Published, 25th Aug, Ransomed Heart // Daily Reading

 
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Posted by on August 25, 2011 in Devotions, GOD, God's Grace, Inspiration, Life

 

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Growing Seeds

My BFF has been preaching the gospel themed ‘wait’. Hold on. Everything will happen at it’s appointed time, there is no need to rush into anything. Time heals all wounds. Wait on the Lord, He will provide for you. Time is your best friend.

When I listen to this, there is always a part of me that wonders, ‘is this guy from this planet?’, ‘What on earth is he smoking??’ I just don’t gerrit – How come for me I’m always in a rush? How come for me, I just cannot wait for the next step? How come for me, I cannot help but wonder what next? How come for me I cannot seem to stop manipulating my surrounds to achieve what I want? What does wait mean anyway?

Someone once called us the ‘Entitled Generation’ or the ‘Microwave Generation’, we pretty much want things now. Right now! Heal this broken-heart now! Make me a millionaire now! Lets fall in love now! I want a promotion now! I should be entitled to benefits now! My start up company should be a hit (never mind it is less than 2 months old).

We pretty much are in a hurry to get it, never mind that Apple actually has a story behind it, never mind that the Addmaya & Nodesix founders have had their character tested along the way. The 75-year-old couple that you idolise have had their love blossom over the 50 something years that they have been together.

When you plant a seed in the ground, there is no forcing it to grow. When you accidentally cut yourself, there is no forcing the wound to heal up fast. When you joined nursery school, you never learned the derivative of y with respect to x (dy, dx). When you were a baby, you never learned to run, then jump, then sit, then crawl. When you get pregnant, you cannot force the unborn child in your womb to develop on your schedule – get ready with in 3 months; I need to go skiing by April.

We have been bombarded with the ‘you can getit now‘ theme – on television, at bookshops, in Church – The Bachlorette/Bachelor (Find love in 11 weeks), 7 ways to be a successful business man TODAY!, 7 ways to be the perfect spouse TODAY!, lets not even get into the genetics studies – In a way, the ‘I want now‘ fever has been been gently but consistently stroked over time.

We are living very much in tomorrow, worried and stressed over it’s uncertainties, planning for the unknown, not learning from yesterday or living in today. What does our future look like if this is all do? Yesterday has a very powerful story to tell, so much to learn; Today is offering us a chance to put into play what we have learned – to water and cultivate. A chance to plant the seeds – seeds that will grow in their own time.

Relationships like seeds, also need time to grow. Rush into it and it may fall down like a stack of cards later on. Don’t give it time and well… Imagine with me for a second – There is this friend of yours, you meet religiously once a week, and whenever you do – they are the one who do all the talking; They call only when they have issues. When you begin to talk, they shut you out. When you do not help solve their issue there and then, they have a tantrum, and start rumors about you, even write blog posts about you.

You would ditch them, wouldn’t you? Yet, this is what we do to God, day in – day out. We expect him to sort out our relationship with him, you know, it’s his responsibility, not mine – alas, this is exactly the same attitude we carry into our relationships with our friends, significant others, bosses and subordinates.

Over the past few months, I have learned that time is my best friend – Growing is such a beautiful thing, she allows you to look back and laugh, smile and grimace at the events that have happened. But more importantly, time heals you, she makes you stronger than your were yesterday and prepares you for what is to come. She teaches you the ways to go, she shows you in slow-mo how a rose bud opens up, she lets you in on the secret of growth.

A secret you can never know unless you are part of the journey.

Wisdom is not cramming our head with principles. It is developing a discerning heart. Waking the Dead

Deds:
Have Your Way – Britt Nicole

 
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Posted by on August 23, 2011 in GOD, God's Grace, Life

 

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Puny Little Minds

If only you let me get that job, If only they saw my potential, If only they had lived one day longer, If only they would buy me that gadget, If only I would get a raise, If only…

The statements that we find ourselves swearing against – “If only…, I will/would”. We surmount all our hope and faith in this one thing at a particular time. Then when it goes through, we are elated beyond words. So excited, our faith is once again restored because something has been done for us. We now believe that anything can happen. Anything is possible. We have seen and we believe – albeit for a little while, till we need our next fix.

But our only issue is that we shall soon ‘need’ something else, and need it ‘badly’. Even more that the previous one. This time we shall plead and cajole, even attempting to twist the arm of the one that we do not see – however, this time round, nothing happens. Instead of the bold confidence that came with the past receiving, your back now stoops and ashes are on your head, you mourn and wail about how no one care, pssh! there is no God. If there was one, he would have let: the promotion pass me by, my best friend die, hunger and famine, pot holes in the roads, senseless war & terrorist attacks.

Oh, this God that is supposed to be almighty, yet fit our own individual definitions of who he is, this one that we have boxed and said – if he were God he would be good – where good means (*insert your definition*). How small he is.

Oh how puny your little mind to believe that because you have chosen to turn your back on Him, He is no longer God, because you curse the very bane of his existence – he trembles with fear in the far corner of heaven, because you reject His gift of Love – he will slowly fade away into the distant past.

If you think you can define your GOD and even go further to box him – then he isn’t that awesome, great & magnificent, now is he?

 
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Posted by on August 19, 2011 in GOD, God's Grace, Life

 

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In The Gardens

Anyone can count the seeds in an apple, but only GOD can count the apples in a seed. Only the Lord knows the staggering potential inside each decision we make. Like Adam in Eden, we can compromise God’s Word in the here and now and live with overwhelming regret. Or, like Jesus in Gethsemane, we can take God at His Word – even when it costs us dearly – knowing the Father makes the potential worth the sacrifice.

I cannot continuously say no to this or not to that, unless there is something ten times more attractive to choose from – Henri Nouwen

(Day 65, Going Places With God – Wayne Stiles)

 

 
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Posted by on August 16, 2011 in God's Grace, Inspiration, Life

 

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Redeemer Saviour Friend

Every stripe upon Your battered back
And every thorn that pierced Your brow
Every nail drawn deep through guiltless hands
Said that Your love knows no end
Redeemer Savior Friend

 
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Posted by on August 2, 2011 in God's Grace, HIM, Inspiration, Life

 

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Today: GOD & Me

Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You’ll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you.

Living then, as every one of you does, in pure grace, it’s important that you not misinterpret yourselves as people who are bringing this goodness to God. No, God brings it all to you. The only accurate way to understand ourselves is by what God is and by what he does for us, not by what we are and what we do for him.

If you preach, just preach God’s Message, nothing else; if you help, just help, don’t take over; if you teach, stick to your teaching; if you give encouraging guidance, be careful that you don’t get bossy; if you’re put in charge, don’t manipulate; if you’re called to give aid to people in distress, keep your eyes open and be quick to respond; if you work with the disadvantaged, don’t let yourself get irritated with them or depressed by them. Keep a smile on your face.

Love from the center of who you are; don’t fake it. Run for dear life from evil; hold on for dear life to good. Be good friends who love deeply; practice playing second fiddle.

Don’t burn out; keep yourselves fueled and aflame. Be alert servants of the Master, cheerfully expectant. Don’t quit in hard times; pray all the harder. Help needy Christians; be inventive in hospitality.

 
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Posted by on May 31, 2011 in God's Grace, Inspiration, Life